Friday: Virginity; Music Speaks; Boyfriend Won't Speak To Mom

It's Friday advice night! I haven't done this in so long and apologize to anyone who actually reads my blog and misses my advice. I've been busy and now I believe I'll have more time to blog regularly like I use to, Monday through Friday. No promises.

Anonymous Asked:
Is it bad that I don' care that I lost my virginity?
I always said I would save myself until marriage, but then over the summer I wound up losing it to my boyfriend at the time, and to be honest, I didn't even really like him that much (I mean I did, but no where close to love). It wasn't special or romantic or anything like that either.. so maybe that's why I don't really care, I dunno. I just always see people who go on about how having se.x for the first time is such a huge deal, and it just wasn't like that to me. I barely even think about it anymore to be perfectly honest, and it only happened back in June. The majority of people are like, oh I regret losing my virginity when I did, etc. But I seriously could just care less. I don't really have any feelings about what happened and I feel like that's really terrible though that I don't, is it? I mean after having it I really don't understand why people do wait until marriage to tell you the truth, because it's just sex. I guess it's special when it's with someone you love and everything, but still, it's nothing that spectacular. Am I wrong for thinking this way?

Dear Anonymous,
There's sex and there's making love. I think you don't regret losing it because you weren't making love you were just having sex with a guy you didn't even really like so of course it doesn't seem special to you. But you make love that's when it's worth waiting for, when you make love it is so much more passionate than sex.
You're not wrong to think the way you are thinking, we all have our own thoughts when it comes to sex. That's just my thought on why you might be feeling a little confused on why you don't think it's nothing special.

Mysterygirl2000 Asked:
I don't know how to say it.
Music helps me with my emotions and lately all I can listen to and sing is Disney love songs like "Beauty and The Beast." Especially the part about "barely even friends then somebody bends unexpectedly," and every time I think about my guy friend, I swear I don't like him but I feel like I'm desperately crying myself to death inside of me and I'm just so confused. I'm not even sure what to say. I cant like him, I refuse to like anyone I never last over a month with anyone. I can't take losing someone else please help me.

Dear Mysterygirl2000,
It's okay to like him. Don't stop yourself from having those feelings. It's what you do about those feelings that makes things confusing most of the time. And if you're trying to stop those feelings from happening or deny those feelings you'll be confused and emotional.
I know better than anyone that music can really help with putting jumbled thoughts into words, into lyrics. There's one person that I love listening to when I don't know how to say things, his name is Chester See and I think you should listen to his song "I'm Falling For You" 

Sisalaac44 Asked:
My boyfriend refuses to speak to my mom. What can I say to him?
I've been dating my boyfriend for 3 months, going on 4. 2 weeks ago, I told my mom that we were dating. She already had hints about it, but I went ahead and confirmed it. She told me that she wanted to personally speak to both of us, jut to set some ground rules since he is my first ever boyfriend. I told him this, and now he refuses to go to my house and speak to my mom. He says that it's going to be awkward, and he doesn't want my mom to yell at him or anything like that. I told him to relax. I've had about 6 awkward conversations in the past 3 days just because I told my family about him, so he can survive 1. Also, my mom has met him before and she loves him. She'd always ask me when he was going to come over to the house again. I told him that he only had to talk to my mom (not my dad), and that she wasn't going to yell at him or anything like that. However he just straight up refuses to speak to my mom. It's going to be really uncomfortable telling my mom that he just didn't want to talk to her. My boyfriend's friends agree with me. The said that they'd try to help me out, but so far things aren't making much progress. I don't know what to do or what to tell him? It's getting to the point where I'm going from nervous to angry and hurt. Help me please.

Dear Sisalaac44,
Let him know that it hurts you that he won't make an effort to sit and down talk to your mom about whatever rules she has. She's being a mom, looking out for you, and he should respect her and her wishes to talk to the both of you about the relationship.
I know we all have our own beliefs when it comes to guys and how they should act around parents, but if a guy isn't being respectful of my parents wishes then he's really not worth it. No matter how much you like a guy, if he doesn't respect your parents then maybe he's not worthy of you. You can tell a lot about a guy by how he treats his parents and his girlfriend's parents. 

Be Beautiful For You!